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The Red Badge of Gayness
South Park's Civil War reenactment, sponsored by "Jagerminz S'More Flavored Schnapps," gets out of hand. Cartman persuades the drunken lot to defeat the northerners so that he can win a bet with Kyle ... 
The Poor Kid
With their parents in jail, Kenny and his brother and sister find themselves in the foster care system. Cartman is sincerely disturbed when Kenny is taken away. He doesn't know who to rip on for being... 
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In order to get out of school, the boys enter an anti-war demonstration. Not really knowing what they're protesting for, Mr. Garrison decides to teach the boys a lesson by making them write an essay about our founding fathers. Cartman, (being the lazy asshole that he is) says that studying is way too much for a nine-year-old to handle and decides to cook up a crazy scheme in order to get out of it. With a crashing boulder, and electrocution Cartman finally gets what he wants... a flash back.
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